Monday, November 29, 2010

Tender Mercies


Psalms 103:2-4 - "Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits: Who forgiveth all thine iniquites; who healeth all thy diseases; Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; who crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies."

I had a tough week last week. Somebody said something to me last Sunday that hurt my feelings. It wasn't a kind remark and it seemed, while I was busy feeling sorry for myself, to bring into focus in a negative way everything that this particular person has said to me in the last six months. Which up to this point I had not taken in a bad way.

Because of her words I lost my way. I shed many hot, bitter tears and was filled with self-doubt, shame, fear, anguish, and despair. I didn't know what to do and didn't feel like I could do anything. I felt paralyzed, diseased and destroyed, if you will, by my insecurity.

I went to bed on Saturday night feeling very bad and sorry for myself. I didn't sleep well. And then I woke up feeling very different.

I woke up feeling hope for the future. I woke up knowing exactly what I could do. I felt encouraged, peaceful, and calm. I woke up feeling the Holy Spirit.

I'm grateful that in a very real way, the Savior makes his presence known in my life. I'm grateful that I am not left to my own strength in this Relief Society calling and in this life, and I'm grateful that there is help for those that ask for it.

I'm grateful that even when I sometimes don't ask for the help I need, when I'm so busy feeling sorry for myself and feeling particularly overburdened and unappreciated, the help comes anyway, and I am left feeling literally crowned with love, kindness and mercy.

I'm grateful that in the midst of darkness and despair a light comes shining through, lighting the way and giving me enough confidence to take another step.

4 comments:

  1. Well, I'd like to slap some sense that person. Anybody who thinks you're not the best EVER is just not paying attention.

    Maybe we're never finished being a mother.

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  2. I agree with Linda...you should have just made a fist and punched her in the nose. Then you'd have really felt good when you woke up the next day. A good butt-whippin' always makes me feel better.

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  3. Who is it who said that it's none of your business what other people think of you? I don't remember, but I think it might be true to some degree.

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  4. I LOVE You! You are so great! Miss you too!

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